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It's so true. OMG, it is. Being depressed for a length of time changes the way one sees the world. My experience is extreme. My psychiatrist figures I've been suffering clinical depression since I was 5 or 6 years old. Relieving the disease doesn't change the thinking. It clears the mud magnificently so you can change the thinking, though. Things I had to overcome after the medication took effect were: ~Distrust of my own feelings. I knew they were skewed, sometimes wildly, and didn't reflect reality. I knew this even as a child.
~Defeating the habit of negative self talk. I said things to myself that I would never put up with hearing another person say, either to myself or anyone else.
There are things I'm still working on, 20 years after treatment began. For instance, I am still terrified to take on big or long term projects. I've dropped so many balls in the past, and it's so embarrassing when they're publicly obvious. The most recent one was when I had to quit the church board of directors because of it. I was so scared to take it on, told them so, did it anyway, and bam. So I'm still deeply scared by that aspect.
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~~~~Becky
~ ~ ~ "And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom."
~ ~ ~ Anais Ain
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